We (meaning I) decided that ordering pizza and buying Hungry Man frozen dinners are not acceptable sources of nourishment (not long term anyway). So, I set upon a journey to teach my husband how to make real home cooked food. We agreed that this would also include dessert because life is no fun without dessert, right? His favorite dessert/breakfast/lunch/supper/snack is cinnamon rolls, or anything cinnamon for that matter. Our daughter is the same way. There's a catch, though. It has to be a cinnamon treat that tastes like cinnamon rolls but doesn't take a lot of time (i.e. patience) or effort (read: skills).
Because god forbid I get hit by a bus or something, both he and our daughter would be totally distraught without cinnamon rolls. And I won't be able to bake it from the grave.. or coffin.. or whatever. What an inconvenience my death would cause.
Keeping in mind that TJ, my beloved and dear husband, can barely boil water (he gets credit for trying, though) this recipe is fairly easy; meaning you can't screw it up even if you tried. Please bear with us; this is a tutorial of sorts. It's my first time teaching and apparently I suck at it. According to T, I don't articulate well and my directions lack focus and specificity. His words not mine. Me? I don't use that kind of language on my blog. No sir, we're simple folk here.
Anyway, we have a cake to bake so it's SHOWTIME!
Discover that you've used the teaspoon measurement for the cinnamon instead of the tablespoon. Proceed to ask your spouse how to convert a teaspoon into a tablespoon and put her death on pause for now and complain that she should have mentioned that mistake instead of just snarking. Figure out that you need an extra tablespoon of cinnamon and go back to add it to the brown sugar.
Add the oil, applesauce and buttermilk - otherwise known as the wet ingredients. Yell at your spouse for not including applesauce in the recipe then discover it's there too. Learn the valuable lesson that you cannot skim through a recipe but have to actually read it.
Show off your lack of coordination by flinging your arm all the way to the other side dripping batter off the spatula all over the place while pouring the rest of the batter all over the tray. Watch as your spouse winces because she's a clean (and control) freak...
Proceed to open the oven and let all the heat out while you go get the pan. Get scolded; close the oven and wait for temperature to go back up. Have pan ready. Put it in the middle rack of the oven. If your name begins with T, put your silicone gloves on and take your glasses off (like you're going on a mining expedition) and carry the pan to the oven.
Wait impatiently for it to bake. Give up waiting after 5 minutes. Go play WoW or TOR... or some other game where one of your guild members calls himself Latex Funbags.
Hear the oven beep and rush down to the kitchen. Smell that heavenly scent of cinnamon.
Mix some icing sugar and soy milk with a drop of vanilla. Forget to take a picture because you're not all there yet and you're living in your own head. Pour the glaze on to the pretty, pretty cake while it is still piping hot.
Give it about 20 minutes before you dig in. Or if your name starts with T, just go ahead and pillage and plunder the hot cake, then complain (using foul language) that it's too hot but keep eating anyway cuz it's too good to stop.
Now, go forth and make cake. Then eat it and enjoy it.
Yields 9x13 inch cake (serves 24)
1 box cake mix, white (dairy, egg, & nut free)
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 cup canola oil
1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce
1 cup soy buttermilk (1 cup soy milk +1 tablespoon vinegar)
1 cup brown sugar, firmly packed
1 1/2 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1 cup icing sugar
3 tablespoon soy milk
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Grease a 9x13 inch baking pan with dairy free cooking spray and set aside. Combine brown sugar and cinnamon in a small bowl and set aside.
In the bowl of a stand mixer, combine cake mix, baking powder, canola oil, applesauce and soy buttermilk. Stir on low speed until ingredients come together then beat on high speed for 2 minutes. Pour half the batter into prepared pan and sprinkle with half of the cinnamon sugar mixture. Spoon the rest of the batter onto the cake. Top with remaining sugar mixture. Swirl with a knife to combine. Bake for 45 to 50 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the centre comes out clean.
In a small bowl, combine icing sugar, soy milk and vanilla. Pour on top of cake while still hot. Let cool then slice or eat it hot right out of the pan like a heathen.
Nutritional Info (Per Serving)
Calories 197.19, Total Fat 5.23g, Cholesterol 0mg, Sodium 218.5mg, Potassium 32.73mg, Total Carbohydrates 36.92g, Fiber 0.35g, Sugar 26.34g, Protein 0.85g
Nutrition analysis is approximate and will vary depending on exact ingredients used. Calculations are based on the Reference Daily Intake (RDI) for a 2000 calorie diet. Nutritional Facts are obtained from Radium Technologies' Living Cookbook. However, Allergymom.ca has no affiliation with Radium Technologies and does not guarantee the accuracy of this information.